Susie Ambrose, founder of Seventy Thirty claims that one recurring theme is clients asking for advice on ‘communication’ . How do you tell your friend how you feel and seek confirmation of your feelings? Susie gives advice on the best way to deal with this situation.
Often Susie’s clients struggle with directness or have not fully prepared themselves for a scenario where the feelings are not reciprocated. Susie suggests that reasons behind struggling express oneself may be fear of rejection, lacking self-confidence, or maybe the fear of losing your friendship.
‘There is no easy answer, other than asking him again in a forthright manner. Ask for a clear answer. Men are not mind readers. Try not to send mixed messages; you do not want to confuse the situation further, especially as you have feelings towards him and you want him to understand them. For example, encouraging him to ask out another girl after a very weak attempt at explaining how you feel sends conflicting signals. It is possible he might have thought that you were not seriously interested in him or you were only flirting. It is possible he did pick up on your signals and is not interested. It’s possible that he mentioned the other girl because he was trying to gauge your reaction to indicate whether you will reject him.’
Do you want a relationship, or something more relaxed that may or may not evolve into a relationship?
‘Do you want a relationship, or something more relaxed that may or may not evolve into a relationship? It’s important that you know what you are hoping to achieve. If he is not interested in you romantically, you should think in advance about what this means for you and how you will handle it.’
‘Whatever the outcome, at least you will know where you stand and you can move on. It will also give youth confidence and the tools to be more direct in the future.’
For more information visit Seventy Thirty.